Navigating social media use: a guide for parents of teenagers

The days when it was normal for teens to be out and about on their bikes with neighbourhood friends, knowing it was time to go home when the streetlights came one, are long gone. Today, their social activities have shifted to digital screens where they can stay in touch with friends, keep up to date with trends, and get entertainment and engaging content – all from the comfort of their homes.

Social media does have benefits. It can help teens express themselves, join moderated chat forums where they can talk openly about topics such as mental health, and learn how others their age cope with challenging situations. And in many ways, parents feel comforted knowing their children are home and safe.

But social media use doesn’t come without challenges for parents. In a 2023 study by Media Monitoring and UNICEF South Africa, teenage participants reported that they can’t go a day without social media apps and that it’s hard to stop once they start scrolling. Many say they spend two or more hours each day on at least one platform.

That’s why it’s important to understand the impact of social media on your teenager. By equipping yourself with knowledge and implementing supportive strategies, you can guide your child through the complexities of using social media while fostering healthy boundaries and relationships.

Understanding social media risks for teens

In monitoring screen time, open communication is key. Too much screen time can interfere with getting enough exercise, doing homework, and spending proper time with family and friends. All of these factors contribute to a child’s mental health. Here are a few areas of concern:

1. Social media is filled with meticulously edited images of celebrities and influencers. They set unrealistic beauty standards for teenage girls, as many of them compare themselves to these highly edited images. This can have a negative impact on their body image and self-esteem, often resulting in body dissatisfaction and even body dysmorphic disorder.

2. Online platforms can be breeding grounds for cyberbullying. Hurtful comments, gossip, and personal attacks have a huge impact, and teenage girls are particularly vulnerable to cyberbullying. It can cause severe emotional distress, anxiety, and depression.

3. Studies show a correlation between the overuse of social media and increased anxiety and depression in teenagers. Fear of missing out (FOMO), online harassment, and a constant need for validation can all cause mental health issues.

4. Social media addiction leads to excessive screen time, especially before bedtime. This can disrupt sleep patterns and impact sleep quality, which has a detrimental effect on mental health. According to the Canadian Paediatric Society’s Adolescent Health Committee, teens need more sleep because they are in a period of rapid physical, intellectual, and emotional growth. Although getting enough sleep may not seem important to them, medical research shows that it is key to healthy development.

Protecting your teenager

Here are some strategies to protect young minds against the threats of the digital age:

1. Talk to your child about their social media experiences. Have honest conversations about the challenges they face, and listen to their concerns.

2. Establish clear rules and limits on screen time and social media use. Encourage them to take regular breaks from their devices. Let them engage in hobbies and sports, or spend time with family and friends.

3. Be a role model: Practise what you preach. Be mindful of your own social media habits and make sure you’re setting a positive example for your teenager. Show them that life can be enjoyable and fulfilling beyond the virtual world.

4. Track online activity: Keep an eye on their online activities. But do so with respect for their privacy. Use parental control apps and tools to help you protect them from harmful content and potential cyberbullying.

5. Help your teenager build a strong sense of self-worth and self-confidence. Encourage them to develop their skills, talents, and interests offline.

6. Teach them to think about what they see and read: Help them understand the importance of critical thinking and media literacy skills. Help them to question and analyse the content they come across online. Teach them to discern between reality and content that is so edited that it creates a distorted view of reality.

7. Encourage real-life connections: Face-to-face interactions with friends and family help reduce the dependency on social media for social fulfilment.

Guiding them safely in the digital age

It's important to help your child understand that you're there to support them through the ups and downs of their social media experiences. Invite open, judgement-free communication so that they can feel comfortable sharing their experiences and concerns. Actively listen to their worries and validate their feelings, offering reassurance and guidance where needed.

When setting boundaries on screen time, involve them in the process to promote a sense of autonomy and responsibility. And remind them that their well-being is your top priority and that their worth is not defined by likes, followers, or online validation.

By working together and staying actively involved in their digital lives, you can help your teenager develop the resilience and confidence needed to stay safe in today's digital landscape.